Friday, January 20, 2012

It's the WEEKEND BABY (and I'm scared!)

This is a long one. Sorry in advance

Yes. Every week I get THAT excited about the weekend.  Anywho. The weekends are TOUGH for me. I'm a person of routine and habit. Mon-Thurs I do very well. Packed lunches and snacks, that are pretty much the same daily with very little variety. Dinner is a "wild card" but portion controlled and healthy.

It's Friday-Sunday that gets me. YIKES. I work from home on Fridays, so I don't eat on schedule like I do when I'm in the office. The plus side is my house is junk free, so it's not a matter of me eating junk, the problem is eating.  Here it is almost 9am and I have no clue what I'm going to have for breakfast (lack of planning). What I should do is stick to the routine on Fridays. Eat at home exactly how I would eat at work. Yep. Good idea. Well today the problem is a lack of groceries. I have some chicken breast unthawed so I may eat grilled chicken and a sweet potato for breakfast and a salad for lunch.

Tomorrow will be another challenge (I guess this is called...LIFE)  Breakfast buffet with my family.  And I will admit, it's not like a eat a whole lot at buffets because I can't. BUT I eat crap and it makes me sick. EVERYTIME. But oh how I love breakfast food. In my mind I would love to start with fruit and a salad, get myself pretty full off of that and then eat a little bit of garbage.  Yes that is the plan, but Lord sticking to that is HARD when everyone around you is eating and enjoying unlimited grease.  Ooh my stomach hurts just thinking about it. Taste good going down, but the aftermath is not ok. Amazing how I used to be able to handle it.  

Oh. Last night I went out to eat at Cracker Barrel. Though I don't track anymore, I decided to track yesterday to see what I was going to have. Thankfully what I wanted (meatloaf, mashed potatoes, greens, and green beans) worked with the plan.  I decided that I would NOT have gravy or bread or a diet coke.  I semi-passed. I got gravy on the side and had about a tbs out of the gigantic bowl they brought me. I was full of course but if there was more food on the plate, I would have eaten it (problem, I know)

Yesterday in Title the trainer talked to me about getting some personal training sessions with him.  He said something about I'm "beyond" the classes. WHAT SON!?! I know for sure I'm not. I can't do every rep of every set yet. I don't think there is a such thing as being beyond these classes. When it gets easy, go harder.
A part of me thinks he's just trying to sell me some sessions, but I like him (not in that way) and I trust the guy could help me get my body where I want it to be. BUT the cost is crazy. I can't afford it anyway.  I would really have to sacrifice some things, and I'm not sure I want to do that now. I will just continue eating right and going to Title. Add some running in there. I know I need to do some weight training, but I suck at it.  I just don't know how......

I'm actually feeling better about things again.  I think being tired comes along with the journey. It's the ebb and flow of things.  I'm ready to see 155 on the scale damnit!  How many people can say they lost half their body weight!  I'm ready for it. CLEAN EATING. PORTION CONTROL. EXERCISE.

Have a great weekend. I'll report in about the weekend..keeps me accountable.


  1. I went to a buffet last semester after my last test and I was so upset....It was such a waste of money because I couldn't eat as much as I used to. I lost my ability to and I am happy to have. We should be grateful that we have at least made some changes in this journey. I know we struggle everyday to make other changes that would help us more in this journey, but we should celebrate the little victories like this. When did you stop tracking? I didn't know you had stopped. I am starting to track and trying daily to do better with nemesis.I agree with you about Title class. Once you feel like it's easy you will move on to a new affordable activity. But ,until then keep rocking! YOU CAN DO IT! :-)

  2. Hey chica! Oh yeah, you can't eat that much anymore. Yep let's be grateful of the progress we've made! YAY!!
    Yep I stopped hard core tracking because I basically eat the same things everyday and can kind of sort of do it in my head. When I get to a plateau or start gaining, I go back to tracking again. You know I'm a HARDCORE advocate of tracking! I'm telling you it really works or at least helps you become aware. Love ya sis. Have a great week!

  3. I've never been to title but the workouts seem challenging! I'm sure as long as you keep working hard you'll be need for a pt for now...Are you do any strength training? I would add that if you aren't...